What Will People Remember?

Probably not what we want; and that's ok.

Years ago I was working with a pastor on his message. He asked me a question I’d never considered before: Is Peter’s betrayal of Jesus in Mark 14:66-72 the last time Peter appears in Mark’s gospel? I looked and, sure enough, it is. Unless you count the general reference to the disciples at the very end of the gospel (in the section that is likely not part of the original), the last time we see Peter in Mark is when he flees, weeping, having betrayed Jesus.

This blew me away. Why? Because it is likely that the primary source for Mark’s gospel was Peter. The two were traveling companions and it is not uncommon to hear Mark referred to as “Peter’s gospel.” Now, I am making the assumption that this tradition (which comes in part from Papias of Hierapolis, who was taught by the disciple John) is reliable. I think it is, if only because the account of Peter’s betrayal could only have come from the man himself. Only he had access to those details.

Which makes Peter’s last appearance in Mark truly exceptional.

Think about it this way: Peter is one of the chief leaders in the early church. He is leader of the apostles, author of two New Testament epistles. His word carries tremendous authority. Given the chance to help shape a gospel, how does he portray himself? Honestly, yes. One of the exceptional features of the entire Bible is the often unflattering portrayal of the men and women who are supposed to be the pillars of our faith.

If Peter helped with the composition of Mark’s gospel, though, he went well beyond honesty. Peter could have had Mark include the moment in John 21 where he and Jesus were reconciled on the beach, where Jesus recommissions him as an apostle and affirms his calling. Listen, if I’m Peter I am insisting that Mark include that part. Obviously I would want people to know that I met the risen Jesus and that everything is cool between us!

But Peter apparently didn’t feel that way. It seems that Peter was content for the last thing people read about him to be his worst moment, his ultimate failure. Remember, it isn’t like Peter can take comfort in there being John’s gospel to straighten things out; it won’t be written for several decades after Mark’s. Even then, this is the ancient world — people can’t just whip out their pocket New Testaments and compare gospels. For all Peter knows, Mark’s account is the only version of events that people will read.

Peter did not need people to know that he turned things around.

Photo by Laura Fuhrman on Unsplash

I think it’s a very healthy thing to consider our legacy and ask, “How will people remember me?” We get so caught up in our every day life (which is quite enough on its own) that we rarely think more than a few weeks ahead. On the other hand, it’s also good to remember the observation made by the author of Ecclesiastes:

I hated all my toil in which I toil under the sun, seeing that I must leave it to the man who will come after me, and who knows whether he will be wise or a fool? Yet he will be master of all for which I toiled and used my wisdom under the sun. Ecclesiastes 2:18-19 (ESV)

We can spend our entire lives laser-focused on leaving a good legacy behind, yet once we are gone that legacy is entirely out of our control. That pertains not only to the things we build, but the sort of person we are.

We might comfort ourselves with the thought that our reputation will live on, that at least we will be honored by those who will come after us for a life of integrity and hard work. Except if the last few years have taught us anything, the reputations of the dead are very much at the mercy of the living. I can’t think of too many people who haven’t at some point been maligned by posterity for some perceived sin.

It would bother me profoundly to know that hundreds of years from now, people knew me primarily for a great failure. Peter was untroubled by such thoughts. I would have seen my betrayal of Jesus as something to explain or felt the need to balance it with a redemption story. Peter wasn’t concerned with his own story at all, seeing his betrayal as an essential part of Jesus’s story.

I assume that I best represent Christ when I am doing good things and succeeding. Peter reminds me that sometimes the way God wants to reveal himself most is through failure.